The Weekly World - #1

Another anti-climatic season draws to a close; the Premier League saw few surprises, save for Roberto Martinez' Wigan Athletic side finally failing to beat the drop. 

If you look hard enough, you'll find an article out there on a Montenegrin chap called Stevan Jovetic, but to avoid jumping on the bandwagon and for fear of repeating anything that a population close to that of China has already said, in this, once weekly article we're going to cover some of the more obscure and entertaining stories from the world of football that have caught my ever-so-easily distracted eye.

The joys of twitter know no bounds: every man and his dog seems to know more than the next, especially on players that most have never heard of (and the rest know from their extensive FM Careers), so a few tweets from our well-informed friends with "connections" shouldn't go amiss.

#JohnCrossOUT

And if The Mirror's man  (who's best story last year was how Carl Jenkinson could move to Manchester City) isn't to your liking, here's some more of your favourite in-the-know-tweeters on what's happening at The Arsenal.

"ITK Wars" / "tweef"

 Turns out Arsenal are being linked with a number of "top, top quality" players, but so far Arsene Wenger appears to be up to his usual tricks in the window, signing (almost) unknown youngster Yaya Sanogo from Ligue 2 outfit Auxerre on a free transfer. Recently recovered from a broken leg, this France U20 international (just called up) has a fantastic record this season, scored in his goodbye game for the Burgundy outfit and is thought to have turned down plenty of other clubs for the chance to work with The Professor. It's officially "medical time."

Across the pond and Manchester City are teaming up with the New York Yankees to create what will be the 20th MLS "franchise", controversially named New York City Football Club.
You can follow their twitter account here. 
Sheikh Mansour's latest business venture seems to have ruffled a few feathers, especially since the Red Bulls are 1) actually based in New Jersey and somewhat paranoid about what this will do to their fanbase, 2) legally bound to the energy-drink-laden name, hindering the marketing opportunities that the new "City" will be sure to take advantage of. 
It's certainly provoked a mixed response from the locals:

In other "news" everyone's favourite Arsenal fan, Piers Morgan received a personlalised picture message from Robin van Persie which he'll no doubt have framed and sitting on his mantle piece before the night is over.

From one **** to another, the photo (which included a sarcastic "thank you for your support") was sent directly from the Manchester United Press Office, who wrote on the back of the double-sided note: "Robin wanted you to have this."

It goes without saying that he doesn't care about Arsenal fans'reaction and that i'll have to wash my hands after finishing this paragraph. What's more worrying is that Piers will feel a sordid sense of pride at having received such a message from such a moron.

Not wishing to leave it on such a sour note, here's a 2011 smash hit by Matze Knop for you to get all hipsterfied to. It's called "I wanna be like Jurgen Klopp" and the song was created to celebrate the 1st of 2 consecutive league titles that Klopp brought back to the Westfalenstadion.

Subscribe to my youtube channel and follow me on twitter, and until next time - have a great week!